A walk in fading light

It's sad to say I still miss Snoopy so much every time I go for a walk with Soba in the rucksack on my back. But the thing is, my walk has become more peaceful and thoughtful without Snoopy 's presence. I can now observe wildlife and enjoy nature better as there is no little doggy to pull me along, trying to jump into the hedges or stopping for wee wee and sniffing this way and that. But I do MISS him and I would exchange all that mentioned just to have him as my walking companion again and again. 😓😭

But I realise that no matter how much I miss him and how hard I wish he was still here, the reality is he has gone and I believe to a much better place.  So, there is nothing I can do but move on and carry his love with me. It's not easy and I've tried and tried...with time it's getting better.

The weather has been awful all week and I don't feel like going for a walk. I become quite lazy without Snoopy hassling me. On Friday, as the evening was drawing in, all of a sudden the sun came out. We seem to get this last bursting of sunlight at the end of the day so often. Most of the time I'm too worn out to be doing anything else but this time I thought to myself I must go for a walk in that fading light. 

So I put Soba in his rucksack and off we went. It was the most beautiful evening in spring. I thought I wouldn't be gone long but as I kept stopping to take photographs and communicating with nature - We were gone for three quarter an hour and we were just gone down the road.

Sheep were out in the field. They were grazing so near to the fence - they looked at me curiously I thought I could pet them but as I got close to them they ran away. They weren't tame after all.  It was dawn on me that they had never come close when I went for a walk with Snoopy. Snoopy scared wildlife away and I had never been able to observe nature closely. I'm not saying it in a bad way because I wouldn't have been for a walk at all if I hadn't had a dog especially a Sprocker Spaniel like Snoopy who were very fond of walking. Now it's a new walking experience.

I stopped at the bridge where Snoopy and I used to walk pass so many times. I missed him but in the same time I was trying to get used to the feeling of freedom that I could stand watching the running river as long as I like. It was really weird not to have him with me - but I'm getting used to it. I'm getting used to not having a dog. Part of me saying to myself that I don't want to get used to it - I want to remember him for the rest of my life.

Of course, I will never, ever forget Snoopy. But I don't intend to wallowing in sorrow too. It's always Snoopy & me -- and now Soba too. It's us - it's always us. The love I have for him is something I can carry with me - it seems a bit painful and heavy at the moment but it will become lighter. One day I will smile to myself when I think, "I had a dog, I once had a dog - a black and white Sprocker Spaniel  - the most beautiful boy in the world."

I don't have to cry my eyes out every time I think of him -- Snoopy was such a happy soul and he wouldn't want that. And I'm sure he wouldn't mind me to justify myself to enjoy my walk without him beside me either.

The light was fading but it was so beautiful - the birds were chatting in the trees and hedgerows. I tend to think they sing in the morning and chat in the evening.

I hope Soba enjoyed the outing. I couldn't tell as I couldn't see his reaction. But he didn't moan so I presumed he was happy.  Again, check out the video at the link here Late spring in fading light

Tractor has left tyre mark on the mud. Just to show you that it's been wet this spring.

It doesn't look that big in the photo but this oak tree is magnificent - it's always reminded me of the tree in Enid Blyton's the magic faraway tree -- Can you see, Wise Old Owl, Dame washalot, Moonface and Mr Saucepan man up there? The tree is definitely big enough for them. I can see them up there every time I walk or drive pass - I say hello to them too. 😊